As the youth of the world begins the celebration of Semana Santa in the Spring Break capitol of the Western Hemisphere, in the tiny city I call my home, nestled between the coconut-heavy palm trees of the Mexican Caribbean, I am faced with one of the biggest decisions of my life.
I count myself extremely blessed. There have been a myriad of miracles in my life; situations where it could have only been the hand of God that was leading me and my family- so impossible were the blessed outcomes. From the unprecedented case that was the adoption of my twin brother and sister, God’s command to art school, my mother’s recovery from the brink of death, to the answered prayers and daily confirmation, His gentle shepherding, and the protection that He has provided us with throughout the many unaccountable journeys in between- God has blessed me.
I sit here now, in my lindo y querido Mexico, with this mountain of blessings behind me and the assurance of God’s continued guidance through the rest of my life ahead.
I do not know where He will lead me in a year, in a week, or in an hour. His plan is what lead me here, to a situation I never would have chosen for myself but now that I am in it, I know I could never have had a more blessed beginning to my life.
This was not the life I set out to live, the person I decided I wanted to be, or the goals I set out to achieve. I didn’t take calculated steps to accomplish this happiness, this lightness, this contentedness. Five years ago, I could not have perceived the life I am now living.
Through the persistent seeking of His will- my only map in life- since my rebirth in 2014, I have transformed in ways beyond what my years, experience, or intelligence would have allowed. God has opened my eyes and brought me to places and situations I could never have reached in my own capacity. By handing over my life to Him, He has made me more fulfilled than I ever was when I was only pursuing my own selfish motives in the hunt for personal happiness.
Free of the confines of a mandatory system and narrow-minded culture to influence my motivations and beliefs, the decision of where to go to college is completely between God and me. Through prayer, people, and circumstances, I trust that He will open the necessary doors to guide me in the direction He wants.
I have no true end goal determining my college decision. Although I like to fantasize about being a famous artist- that is my purpose for wanting to go to art school. God’s purpose is so much bigger than I am, so much greater than I can perceive. If my personal end goal doesn’t come to fruition and the true reason God has directed me to go to college is simply to influence someone there to come to Him- then I rejoice and embrace the incredible opportunity to do the most fulfilling thing in life: to make disciples of Christ.
The apostle Paul is my favorite figure in the Bible; he lead by example and because of him, I know that if I surrender all to God I will be fulfilled in life. Paul embodies the definition of a missionary, traversing the world and bringing people to Christ with a passion. He lived bearing the price of redemption for a lifetime of sin which I believe was God’s way of preparing a humble man to disciple the darkest corners of the earth from a place of understanding. He was not fearless, but he was brave. He had no material possessions to his name, and yet he was abounding in wealth. He was not born great and did not live great until he was humbled before God, turning away from his culture and the expectations of society to embrace a life that made him an honorable man and earned him a place in history as an example for generations to come. Paul was hardcore. Throughout this decision process, I hope I can give the reins to God and let Him lead like the example Paul set.
And so, as I wait to receive my final acceptance (or rejection) letter from RISD, I am at peace. It is all part of His marvelous master plan, and I know that His plans for me are bigger and greater than I am. The greatest gift in life is the Great Commission, which also happens to be the most humbling and smallest of acts in juxtaposition to our world-view. That is the work I look forward to most fervently, and no matter what RISD says or where I go to college or even if I find success as an artist, nothing will change the assured future I have doing God’s work wherever life takes me. (Hopefully around the globe.)